Men ever so slightly half naked

'bashing' the crap outta each other with inanimate objects along with themselves as this is the one night of the year where in all the major matches where this is allowed.Yes ladies and gentlemen I am watching WWE Extreme Rules. This is my guilty pleasure and I see nothing wrong with watching these random pay per views that they have on Sky Sports and Raw on a Tuesday evening with oiled up men throwing themselves at each other while holding on to things like chairs pipes and sledgehammers or trying to get out of cages that on the face of it look quite easy to get out/escape from if there wasnt 15/16 stone of muscle standing in your way however I really should have my head in revision guides text books and notes or working out at circuit but unfortunately daddy seems to have put a stop to that little piece of social contact that i get of which I normally get very little of anyway. I mean even my family have better social lives than me.

Anyway on a lighter not I think my wanting to go to university is kinda pissing off my postman as on Saturday he actually had to knock on my front door to give us our post I had so many prospectuses along with the rest of our post it couldn't actually get through our letter box which could be seen as a bit of a disaster but i spose that depends on which way you look at it. anyway i get this wednesday kinda off (ima on a school trip) and a naice lie in next wednesday after a four day weekend for another school trip. All this along with the draft filling up my tomorrow evening and half a ton of revision shall be a very fun week.

After all....if you can't explain it to a six year old, you don't understand it yourself." Albert Einstein.

Wow

Ok two posts in one day arent you lucky, well i thought you deserve it seeing as for the last few weeks i have just filled this with me ranting about how shitty my life is and how my love life is crumbling beneath me. Anyway the sun is shining and the world seems to be okay for one day so here

Much Love
StephanieJade x

How Do

I tell you that i like you cos seeing as your a man and dont get the fact that i am blatenly putting it out there and it seems that everyone apart from you and your now brown haired head (i think all that dyes gone to your head to be honest) realises this fact. See now i dont really wanna put into a text cos that seems heartless and im too scared(yes i just admited it) to pull you aside and say it to your face cos if you say no then i would have to stay and hang around you for the rest of the night but despite of this rather dismal fact i have a speech on how to tell him. Bear with me cos this was thought up while in bed at 2 o'clock this morning.
S:Hey can i talk to you for a sec
H:Yer sure
S:Ok listen I like you and i need to know where i stand with you
Enter rest of my life falling apart conversation here.
Help me please cos i really dont have a clue what to do.

I Want You,

This is how im feeling at this particular moment with thanks to the delightful Kings Of Leon.

Get back on track, pick me up some bottles of booze (preferably vodka or lager)
Fickle freshman, probly thinks she's cooler than you(Yer she probably does as does he)
A hay ride at 5, everybodys comin around
So go press you skirt, word is there's a new girl in town... (Really well i guess then im rather late)

I call shotgun, you can play your RnB tunes(I always get shotgun wether your playing RnB or not tbh)
The fellow?, it always comes a little too soon
The land of the free, freshened up from babyfaced shame(there isnt anywhere thats free & i dont really have anything to be ashamed about)
Put your eyes on me, and I know a place that we can't get away... (I dont really want your eyes on me on there own i'd like alot other things
Just say I want you, just exactly like I used to
Cos baby this is ooooonly bringin me down...

Home-boy's so proud, finally got the video proof
The night vision shows she was only duckin the truth
It's heavy I know, black guy with the gift down below
A choke and a gag, she spit up n came back for more...(shes a dirty slag she'd have anything with a pulse even if they are gay or whatever they're telling everyone these days.)

She sed I want you, just exactly like I used to (I DO WANT YOU but seeing as i've never had you before but i do want you)
And baby this is ooooonly bringin me down...(the only place i'd love for you to bring me down from is hell/heaven depending on which way you wanna send me)
She sed I want you

I want you, just exactly like I used to
And baby this is oooonly bringin me down...
I said I want you, just exactly like I used to
And baby this is oooonly bringin me down

Much Love
StephanieJade
x

Ive Made Up My Mind

For now that is until something else needs to be added to the forever growing to-do list. This afternoon i decided to not all together give up on my dream of being a world-class forensic scientist and concentrate on my law & history courses as these seem to be the only way ima gonna get anywere in life. I also decided that i will still lust after both men but im gonna try and focus my romantic attentions towards just one with try being the key word and just one being the extremely key phrase within that sentence though if that doesnt work i will be screaming from the top of my block'thats it i'm becoming a god damn bloody nun'.
I like the weather being like this but another thing on this ever growing list of mine is to get away from it all and lie on a beach somewhere with a good book and a rather large bottle of rum or other alcoholic beverage to get everything sorted within the large swirling mass that is called my brain but i highly doubt it because nothing ever really escapes from there its like the handbag sketch from Lee Evans:Big
Woman:Here love get this outta my bag
Man:Nahhhh here love you do it Ive seen things go in there and they aint never come out.
But anyways life does seem to be looking up im feeling a growing love for my chemistry & history AS levels.
'To errr is to human, To arr is to pirate.
Much love
StephanieJade
x

Two Nights Out

And still my love life is fucked. However this time it was my own flaming fault maybe i should have just gone upstairs with him and let him get exactly what he wanted but no i had to stay down stairs and sleep on his front room floor.Though i did suprise myself by making the first move after complaining for most of the night cos i normally like the guy to make the first move traditional much. i gave him a hug cos he made me a cuppa tea which i always drink when i get drunk then i gave him a kiss and all he said was that was unexpected instead of what i wanted which was either a proper return kiss or a cute comment ahhh well a girl can only wish.It also turns out that he still has feelings for this other girl so basically i feel that he was with me for a) out of pity, b) i was only girl (i think) out of our group that he hadnt been with, c) he just wanted to get laid, d) i was the rebound or there may be the rather scary reason that i dont really want to admit that he actually liked me as a person and thought we could work but im going for the former seeing as the balance of probabilites (naice bit of legal language for you guys) is leaning on that side. He lent me his hoodie as i was freezing ( i think he needs to get the heating engineer out cos that central heating twas shit) which was naice of him and all but when i went to give it back to him as there was no possible way i could have left with it on anyway him being the lazy arse that he is was still in bed so i left it along with his indanna jones hat on the chair in his parentals room i went see ya later love expecting nothing more than an acknowleging shrug of the shoulders but no a stunted conversation ensued about how it was naice for me to come and he'll see me when he comes back then with that i took my leave he also didnt reply to my thankyou text ( my mummy taught me manners and people should realise that they dont cost anything) so i think hes just ignoring me. then there is the other bloke who im guessing will be on top form tonite with the fliriting and everything with it being his birthday but after the last two days in my life i dont think i can deal with that but am i countering this by not going out tonight not to see him no im going because i have his card and i want to give it to him personnally to see his face and because my liver needs alot of coke. Are you good at math?Can you substitute my X without asking Y please?
Much love
Stephanie
x

Ive decided that....

Im amazing. Ok so please dont take that as me being all big headed and having a HUGE ego cos while i believe there are times where i am big headed and can have a egotistic complex those times are kinda few and far between really. I was getting ready to have a shower when i saw myself side on in the mirror and it dawned on me finally that im not the ugly sheep that ive believed that i am up till now i have a beautiful face amazing legs a pretty naice rack if i saw so and a pretty good back so i can i jump for joy knowing this. No. Why i hear you cry. Because while i would be happy to be any choice on your list i'd rather be number one basically i wanna tell you how i feel without feeling like a douche and you actually returning those feelings. I wanna just go up to you and say i wanna be with you and everything but seeing as from what ive heard and what i know of you you're one of those guys that thinks hes amazing with women but im guessing you'd probably treat me like a douche and i'd probably let you and keep on letting you do it cos i dont want to go with the flow anymore and end up alone as always. Though i know im on my own because while i'll flirt be all nice to you and probably end up being with you in all senses of the word but i'll still be deep down the fucking cold heartless beatch that has an inability to properly be with anyone. Basically im pouring my heart out to you here cos i want you to try and make me change for the better even though you wont read this cos your a facebook child i wanna say i think im falling in love with you.
Much love
Stephanie
x

Men&Friends dont really mix

Ok so a while a back i was kinda with this guy who shall remain nameless (as will other people in this story) and it was complicated then after we had apperently sorted everything out it turns out while were sorting it out he went and slept with one of my friends so that thats the first reason why they dont really mix. Anyway it gets worse after a time of dodgy and strained friendship we made up (please dont rant at me for making up with her) but it seems the rest of our lil group of friends seem to have ex-communicated her and they think (possibly quite rightly) she is a slag but after a shindig on good friday it turns out im friends with a bunch of man whores as despite having a girlfriend on boy got with three girls then this guy i still like after so much shizelle kisses a woman (who if i was to turn into a lesbian and had to choose someone out of my friends to go with it would be her) then practically sleeps with me and they have the audacity to call her a slag so thats another reason. So basically if i dont get my love life sorted out pretty i soon you'll probably hear me shout 'do you know what fuck this i'm becoming a nun'.
Much Love
StephanieJade
x